Saturday, July 25, 2020

One Of Those Women?

A dress. It's not a photography blog, ok? 
Many years ago my flatmate and I decided to have a party in our apartment. We were living in the middle of a building with windows front and back. Left, right, up, and down were other apartments. They were mostly occupied by retired women - probably because it was a building of tiny apartments in an old neighbourhood. So being British and polite, we knocked on all the neighbouring doors to tell them in advance, apologise for the noise, and assure them that it would be over at midnight.

Back in our apartment, my flatmate said, "did you notice how every door was opened by a bra-less middle-aged woman?" We fell about laughing. We didn't get it. We didn't understand how not going out to work, not having a partner or flatmates, not having friends popping over without notice, can lead to a level of not bothering to get dressed heretofore unimagined.

I have DD of course but she's as laid back as I am. When we made the list of what clothes she needs for this summer it boiled down to 1 T-shirt, 1 pair of shorts, and 14 pairs of pyjamas. Even on a normal Shabbat (Saturday) we sometimes don't get dressed all day if we're not meeting up with friends. So I was halfway there before this isolation business. I blame a lot of it on the extreme heat in the summer but essentially, I had become one of those women.

My current neighbour, one of the first of us to go into quarantine after returning from the US in March, is also a single woman. However, she got up early every day, dressed as if she were going to work, and kept to some sort of routine. I want to be one of these women. I was not in quarantine at the time and we'd meet on our balconies - she in full make-up and executive blouse, me in my bathrobe.

The Fly Lady says the first thing you should do every morning is get up and dress till shoes. There is so much common sense in this. When your friend brings something round for you and asks if you can meet her at the corner as she's in a rush, you can just nip down to meet her. When someone says, "meet me in Roladin for coffee in 20 minutes," you can be there in 20 minutes because you don't have to also shower and dress in that time.

Yesterday I decided that with another five weeks of summer break still to go, I was not going to be one of "those" women anymore. So this morning I got up early, showered, and dressed till shoes (my Fitflops do double duty as shoes and slippers). And here I am. All dressed up and nowhere to go - because we're actually trying not to socialize atm.

So did it make any difference? Yes of course it did. Not sure yet. I'll give it a few more days and let you know.


  1. I never stay in my Pj's. I just don't get it, I am one of those women who dress every day once up. I might give myself an hour if I'm having a lesidurelyh breakfast or I tend to clean the bathroom in my pj's, so I can shower afterwards. Mich x (PS I'm also a Fotflop lover)

    1. I think it's different if you live with other adults or a larger group of people. There is much more likely to be popping out together or to get something for someone, pick someone up, or someone coming by for one of the others, etc... And you are more likely to make more of an effort to be a bit more presentable. I need to learn to do that for myself at a time when we're not going out much or socializing at all.

  2. I'm on my own and freely admit that I quite quickly became "one of those women". The situation has improved as I now go into the office 2 or 3 mornings a week although I no longer wear lipstick as a mask just smears it and I no longer wear earrings as I lost the backings on more than one pair while taking off my mask!

    On days when I don't go in I will usually still shower, brush my teeth and do my hair - but then I often just put on a clean nightgown - with temperatures hitting close to 40C on many days it's just the coolest option! I only have A/C in the bedroom and my apt. faces west so I get the afternoon sun.

    My office mate is one of those people who dresses properly every day but honestly, I'm past it.
    Frankly - most of my friends tend more towards the "casual" end of things. :-)

    1. I also don't wear earrings anymore. I'm only aiming for the most casual clothes and a full set of underwear. We're also suffering in the heat so the clothes are minimum anyway. 2 - 3 days in the office sounds like the perfect amount of time to keep a loose schedule and routine to the week. It's the endless weeks of nothing that wear you down.