Such Is Life

I'd like to say, "trying to stay healthy,"
but I'm way beyond that and now into
"trying to get healthy again." 

This week, after receiving two messages from blog-friends about my absence,  I realised that you can't just disappear from the blogosphere with no word of explanation to your blog friends. 

Apart from not having much to write about due to the current restrictions on going anywhere, seeing only a small circle of people, working from home, etc... I've been reluctant to write anything about how I'm organising the apartment, how we binge watch tv series together into the night, coping with zoom teaching, cooking and sewing, or any other pass-times that are keeping us contentedly jogging along during corona times. 

Even mentioning sitting out on our balcony and enjoying the view with a cup of coffee in hand seems like a slap in the face to those who live in less comfortable domiciles and cannot go out. A Reasons 2B Cheerful post at his time would just be rubbing salt in the wounds. 

Everyday I read on FB about people who've lost their jobs or businesses that they've spent years building up, about people who can no longer afford to pay their rents or mortgages and are afraid of becoming homeless, and people who can't afford to put food on the table. In Israel we now have 25% unemployment. Like everywhere, the tourist, hospitality and entertainment industries are dead, many shops and other commercial concerns are shuttered until further notice, and those who still do have money are not spending it anyway. 

Added to that the fact that I have an almost teenager who doesn't want me to write about her or post photos of her on the blog or occupy any space or speak or breathe. Fair enough but take out the 'mum' bit and I'm just Midlife Single, which is a bit sad and certainly doesn't define me. I thought of closing the blog down but I still want to write. I though of changing the name or starting a new blog. All still possibilities as I approach my 10 year blogiversay in January. 

So that's where I'm at re the blog. Here are a few other observations from my dining table in November 2020.  

1. Whilst actually teaching far fewer hours than in previous years and saving on the travel time, my online obligations to the school seem to stretch and take the whole day, even on days when I'm supposedly not teaching. 

2. Princess Diana died because she didn't wear her seat-belt. End of. 

3. Just call me Harry and wife are desperately trying to stay relevant in an organisation that they left. It would be like me calling the Head of the school I left a few years ago and asking her to include me in the school magazine. No one would care. The Markles are playing at being Royals in America and no one cares.

4. It's my daughter's Bat Mitzva (12th birthday) in three weeks and I'm waiting to find out the regulations for the next few weeks before trying to arrange something meaningful with fewer than 10 people. Or a few fewer than 10 people events. I'd like to take solace in the fact that this has saved me a fortune by not having a big party, but I'm not earning the fortune that would have [eventually] paid for it all.

I can't promise to be back next week, or even the week after. Probably another round up of thoughts and a brief catch-up in December. Which is a shame because I've just made it back into the TOTS100 top 500 and I'm going to slide down the scale again next month. Oh well. Such is life. 

Dear Meghan, I'm Sorry

Here's a picture of a Peacock in Kew Gardens

Dear Meghan,
I am so sorry that everyone is against you. Of course nothing is your fault.

You are estranged from your Father's family and now Harry, who had a close relationship with both his brother and his grandmother, is alienating his family. But it's not your fault. I can't think why they should be upset when you call their family a toxic environment.

Britain gave you a fairy tale wedding and spent several million pounds on the house you were gifted by the nation, via the Queen. But now I hear that we are all racists and we hated you from the start. I'm so sorry that we didn't give you enough.

On you tour of the poorest regions of Africa, where people don't have enough water to drink, you explained that you were struggling, and not thriving. I'm so sorry. No wonder you found kinship with those poor African villagers.

I respect your need for privacy and a normal family life, away from the constant glare and judgement of the media. By and large, the UK media, at least, has left you alone, not bothering you at all as you continue to jet around the world, leaving your son with his nanny. I'm sorry that the paps who you say are hiding in the bushes outside your house, don't know the meaning of privacy and normal family life. This is not your fault obviously.

And lastly I applaud your innovative travel organization, Travelyst, that promotes environmentally responsible travel. Of course most of Britain is already environmentally responsible when it comes to their leisure time. Many cannot afford to go away at all so they might take the bus down to the seaside for the day. Others get on the train or take the car and explore places around our beautiful islands, camping, caravaning, B&B, in holiday parks, or comfortable guest houses and family run hotels. You probably don't know any of these people but that's not your fault.

I sincerely hope you get what you deserve in the future.
Midlife xxx

Meghan Markle: Sabotage By Wardrobe

I don't know who is trying to sabotage Meghan Markle and set her up for failure but whoever, or whatever, they are doing a good job of manipulatively destroying her personality outfit by outfit. I saw Germaine Greer on the TV programme This Morning and immediately knew what she was talking about. I have been thinking the same for weeks.

You only have to Google Meghan Markle Images to see the difference between how she dressed before the engagement, when she presumably chose her own clothes, and how she is being dressed now.

Every outfit since the engagement has been dowdy. Heavy material in boring neutral colours. Too much material making her look like an old dowager rather than a young blushing bride. Most outfits are ankle length at the bottom and over the collar bone at the top. She is swamped in an effort, it seems, to erase any suggestion of a nice figure - or any figure. I am absolutely certain that Meghan would never have chosen these outfits for herself.

In contrast, Kate is dressed in light outfits showing off her youth and great figure. Bright colours, wonderful designs to just above the knees so we can see her shapely legs, and soft playful designs that many women of all ages would be happy to emulate.

I didn't just take Germaine Greer's word for it, I went to Google Images to see the full range. Look at Meghan Markle Images and then look at Meghan and Harry Images. Do you see it? It's as if Elizabeth Hurley morphed into the Queen Mother. I was more than shocked. This has to be a deliberate and manipulative ploy.

There is no reason why Meghan Markle shouldn't be a shining model of British fashion. She has the looks, the polish and the figure. Money is no object. Any designer would give their right arm to have the opportunity to dress Meghan to show off their clothes. She would do them proud, if only she were allowed. It's not like she's unaware of fashion - just look at the way she dressed before.

Someone is controlling Meghan Markle's wardrobe in a way that does her a major disservice. Someone is deliberately making her look the worst she can look without being blatant about it. They choose expensive couture so you can't say they're treating her like Cinderella in rags. No, they are waging a far more devastating and subtle campaign to crush Meghan Markle outfit by outfit.

I have no concrete motive. Maybe it's a test of her staying power. Maybe it's we the public who are being manipulated so that we shouldn't love her until we are permitted to do so. Or maybe they are really out to destroy her for her.... what? Her background? Her ethnicity? Her divorced status? Her Chutspah? Who knows. But something is going on here and I believe that the truth will out eventually.

The British Hate Success

Today there is an article in The Mail Online about how the Middleton family are cashing in on Skyfall, the new James Bond film. As usual the Daily Mail sets the tone and invites comments of general outrage. Sometimes the comments under an article tell the DM to stop being ridiculously pathetic and can be absolutely hilarious. I love it when the true British dry sense of humour comes out as with yesterday's silly article about how chef Heston Blumenthal swabs his mouth with a tampon between bites so as to maximise the taste experience. One fellow wrote: What a great idea, I  must try it tonight with my beans on toast. I LOLed.

Generic secret agent with no name.

Today, however, the comments of general outrage and outright venom poured in. This not the first time this has happened. People were also put out about the Middletons' party business making money out of the Royal Wedding, the Jubilee and the Olympics. It seems that the Middletons are now fair targets. Any success is obviously a crude cashing in on their Royal connections, tacky and just plain greedy (all accusations thrown today in the DM comments).

Since when is running a successful business tacky and greedy? No one slams Primark for being tacky and greedy. JK Rowling was a struggling single mother who wrote a few books and she's practically a saint now.

Carole Middleton started Party Pieces by putting together party bags at her kitchen table. They were already millionaires by the time Kate started dating William. They built the business through hard work and initiative. When the Royal wedding was announced Kate was the darling of the masses - a commoner making it into the closed ranks of the aristocracy. A real success story, if not quite Cinderella.

Cashing in on Christmas?

Since then it's been down hill all the way for the Middletons as far as respect and public opinion goes. It seems that the British love a good success story unless you become too successful or are seen to be enjoying it too much. Then all outrage and venom breaks loose.

The thing about parties is that people need an excuse to have them - birthdays, Christmas, New Year, Midsummer, Back to School, Hallowe'en, Guy Fawkes, retirement, Bar/Bat Mitzva, wedding.... It doesn't matter the excuse, you never get an invitation saying: We're having a party because we haven't had one for a while and we feel like it. A party business provides the props to go with all the myriad of occasions and themes people choose. When a new blockbuster film comes out there are wizard parties, hobbit parties, or secret agent parties. There are Bafta, Grammy and Oscar parties. There are X Factor Final parties and World Cup Final parties. For all these parties we like to decorate and have the props.

Sue me!

We all opposed and decried the strict bans on any displays of Olympic themes that might benefit small businesses during the Games. Events like the Royal wedding, Jubilee and the Olympics are supposed to be national events that we can all benefit from. The nation paid for them after all. What would Christmas be like without the decorations, nativity scenes and Santas? The Jubilee would have been a bit flat without the street parties, school celebrations and the bunting don't you think?

Party Pieces is a successful business providing a service. If people didn't want that service the business would fail. As one (heavily red arrowed) commentor wrote: Some people are confusing opportunism with responding to demand. The Middletons work hard for their money unlike many of the aristocracy who were born into large tracts of land and lucrative trust funds. One comment in the DM had the audacity to say: This is why the Royal Family should never marry a commoner. Other comments said that the Middletons' greed and pushiness would be the downfall of the Royal Family.

If you only read the DM you'd think the British are a nation of jealous losers. It's ok to be born into wealth but not to earn it through hard work? When a small travel company gave Mr Thomas Cook a free weekend in Paris they were applauded for taking advantage of the company Thomas Cook's shortsightedness. Taking advantage of a situation is how businesses thrive. Only the Middletons aren't included in this economic general principle.

I have to admit that I was a little ashamed as well as disgusted with the comments in the DM today.

All pictures from Google images.

Nude Sunbathing, My Royal Dilemma

In the wake of this summer's sensational (not) Royal scandals resulting in nude photos of the future Queen of England and Prince Harry (on separate occasions) being readily available on the internet, I thought I'd share my experience of and feelings about nude bathing.

A few people I know went to the South of France this summer and reported back that everyone goes topless, it was no big deal. Some of them joined in, some didn't and some evaded the question. I once went to a nudist beach while on holiday in Greece (but I didn't inhale ;o)). It wasn't like an organised naturist resort with strict rules or anything like that. Rather it was a secluded bit of coastline that was known for sunbathers sans frontiers and you should just be aware if it's something that bothers you.

I went down to the nudist beach with a few friends I'd met on the holiday and we all took off our clothes and sat on our towels chatting and eating grapes, feta cheese, olives and freshly baked bread (as one does in Greece). One girl kept her bikini bottoms on. I only noticed this after a [long] while and remember thinking that I didn't know that was allowed. I wished I had instead of just following the crowd. On the other hand, I didn't feel uncomfortable sitting in a mixed group of six men and women, not strangers but not friends I would see again after I flew home, which happened to be the next day as this was the final day of my holiday.

Suddenly I noticed another tourist making his way down the snake path to the beach. It was an older gentleman with whom we had also connected and spent a few evenings eating and shooting the breeze over a few bottles of wine. I had a lot of respect for this man and, as he approached, I found myself reaching for my dress and pulling it over my head. I realised that I wasn't comfortable sitting in the nude in the presence of this man.

Why? I thought about it a lot afterwards and came to the conclusion that the five younger adults were like me, having fun, trying to find themselves, etc. But this older man was a proper person from the real world. I didn't conduct myself in the real world with no clothes on (other than in a relationship or a female changing room). All at once I felt inappropriately dressed, or undressed.

Later that evening we all went out to eat and there was a strange atmosphere (or possibly it was just me). It was as if we'd crossed a line between behaving properly and not. If we had already crossed the line what would happen next? The most relaxed one among us was the clever girl who'd kept her knickers on. Nothing eventful happened that night and the next day I went home. I had been planning to swap addresses and maybe keep in touch for a while but in the end I didn't bother.

So that's my experience of nude sunbathing. I wouldn't do it today. Hindsight and maturity have taught me that it's not for me. Back then, no one was stupid enough to take their camera out (they might have been lynched) but these days, it's much easier for someone to take out a phone, for which there are many legitimate reasons to look at it on the beach, and you've been photographed while the phone owner is still saying s/he only wanted to check the temperature/messages/stockmarket. I wouldn't risk it. Even sitting at my laptop late at night, I always make sure I'm covered adequately. One false Skype and a click and your boobs could be permantently out there somewhere in cyberspace, threatening to come back and embarrass you in the future.

Since then I have been skinny dipping at night (well not skinny exactly but without a cozzy) but underwater doesn't count, especially in the dark.

I live a pretty low-profile sort of life. Not many people would even notice if a nude picture of me appeared somewhere. If they did they probably wouldn't care and it certainly wouldn't make the newspapers. However, I'd be embarrassed and I would probably lose my job if gossip spread about it.

So if I know of the risks, why doesn't the heir to the throne who's grown up in the public eye and whose mother and aunt (Sarah) were caught out by photographers in very similar and equally private circumstances? It has also been pointed out that there were presumably security guards with them. Are William and Kate OK with her going topless in front of their bodyguards? And what is the point of wasting all that police time and French tax money trying to stop publication when all the photos are one click away on everyone's internet device?

You made a mistake guys and may this be the biggest one you ever make (that's a blessing btw). Get over it and move on. And perhaps think twice about undressing outside the house in future.

Credits: All pictures from Google Images

Our Own Royal Protocol

The Queen has established the new Order of Precedence to take into account the new Duchess in the family. You can read about it here in The Telegraph. Apparently, within the family, there are those who are disgruntled when the rules are adjusted and those who are, on occasion, inconvenienced.

I only read about this because a friend posted it on facebook today. He was quite upset about it. There was a rather angry rant about stupid and arcaic rules, there wouldn't be a Royal Family without support of the proletariat, blah blah blah, rant rant... And then others chipped in with how silly it all is, etc... etc...

In reply to both of the above, I would like to tell you about the strict pecking order and some of the family rules and rituals that apply in our house. After all, if it's all right for the Royals to publish theirs it's all right for me to publish mine.

 1. DD has to *brush* her teeth first, before I give them a once over. There is no compromise on this and all hell to pay if it is not adhered to.

2. Before leaving her at Nursery I have to pick DD up and give her a kiss and a cuddle. Then she has to give me me a kiss and a cuddle. Following this, with her still in my arms, I have to say, "I love you, I love you, I love you." Then she has to say it. Then she goes down and has to run to the balcony so that we can say 'goodbye' when I get outside. It sounds complicated but these rituals do eventually become second nature.

3. I am never allowed to sit on DD's chair at the table. Never. End of.

4. The flannel that DD uses to cover her eyes when I rinse the shampoo off her hair, has to be folded in a particular way. This conforms to the ancient practice, first observed when she was quite small. No deviations are tollerated.

5. A kiss and a cuddle in bed in the morning are mandetory. If I'm up first I am sometimes commanded to lie down again for the purpose of the above.

6. DD must throw her bath toys into the bath by herself. Mummies must not interfere.

7. Cutlery must be chosen from the drawer by the user.

8. Bottles with drinking nozzles in the cap that can be clicked open and shut, take precedence over simple flat caps. DD gets first choice, always.

So there you have it. We are equally as tied up in our own rituals as the Royals. Funnily enough, no one seems to be as emotionally charged by ours as they are by the Queen's. What silly rules and rituals does your family follow? Apparently it's the season to reveal all.

*All pictures are from Google images.