Monday, December 12, 2011

Not So Silent Night

The 100 Word Challenge from Julia's Place (click to see the other entries) is getting into the Christmas spirit this week with a re-wording of a popular carol on the theme of Christmas Dinner. We all love it and have fond memories of stuffing our faces till we're fit to burst. All the traditional foods, the minions of family and other guests around the table, the excitement of the first carve of the turkey, the brandy alight on the Christmas pudding, the mince pies with coffee afterwards. And, yes a wee drop of Baileys in the coffee, thank you, I only do this on Christmas you know... But how did this fine feast appear on the table? Maybe we should take a moment to remember the cook? The woman, usually, who didn't have such a Silent Night....


Last night, long night
Stuffed the turkey tying it tight
Peeled potatoes setting them right
Round the turkey as squashed as I might
Put in the oven at first light
No wonder I'm looking a fright.

Last night, eternal night
Brussel sprouts taste like shite
But they're still a Christmas rite
I made the pudding to set alight
I was up cooking past midnight
No wonder I'm looking a fright.

Last night, all night
Baked mince pies for carollers' bite
Sausage rolls that always delight
Kitchen cleaned and shining bright
A Bottle of Baileys eased my plight
No wonder I'm looking a fright.

*The picures are from Google Images under Exhausted Woman
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32 comments:

  1. jfb57December 12, 2011 at 11:41 PM

    F-a-bu-lous!Love it.It is such a great reminder of history. I think there are still kitchens like that even now. The pictures really made it too. Thank you so much for taking up this very silly challenge!

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  2. Rachel SelbyDecember 12, 2011 at 11:44 PM

    Not silly at all Julia - loved the challenge. Thanks for commenting.

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  3. UnknownDecember 12, 2011 at 11:44 PM

    ROFL! Genius and so accurate!

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  4. Rachel SelbyDecember 12, 2011 at 11:49 PM

    Livi - especially the bottle of Baileys eh? ;)

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  5. AnonymousDecember 13, 2011 at 12:33 AM

    Another amazing example. Nicely done!!

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  6. AnonymousDecember 13, 2011 at 2:18 AM

    Brilliant :) can identify with this one

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  7. Rachel SelbyDecember 13, 2011 at 7:45 AM

    Thankd Tao and Gill - gender is starting to show in the comments ;)

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  8. Adventures of a Middle-aged MatronDecember 13, 2011 at 1:07 PM

    Very clever! Thank goodness my husband takes care of all that, (although I wouldn't mind shouldering the burden of the Baileys!)

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  9. AnnaDecember 13, 2011 at 1:25 PM

    Great piece. Love the pics too, really added to it.
    Thank Goodness for Baileys hey!

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  10. Lisa Wields WordsDecember 13, 2011 at 2:12 PM

    So perfect!

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  11. VentahlDecember 13, 2011 at 2:14 PM

    Inspired. And accurate. Although, what would I know :P

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  12. AnonymousDecember 13, 2011 at 4:29 PM

    DancingInTheRain:

    Very nicely put - the words used, the rhymes , and the realistic images they evoked. Felt it was me! The pics are a great added touch.

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  13. ColinDecember 13, 2011 at 6:20 PM

    Well, I always used to cook Christmas dinner, but never went as far as making mince pies for carol-singers!

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  14. Rachel SelbyDecember 13, 2011 at 7:27 PM

    Thanks for the lovely comments everyone, I think this week has been the most enjoyable so far. And, Colin, I don't think anyone since Mrs Bridges has gone that far. :)

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  15. caughtwritingDecember 13, 2011 at 7:48 PM

    Great one, what a lovely idea to do it from the point of view of the person having to do all that cooking, rather than just concentrating on the food. Polly

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  16. UnknownDecember 13, 2011 at 8:28 PM

    Very clever and I'm sure you don't look a fright!

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  17. h0peful mummyDecember 13, 2011 at 9:24 PM

    i *love* this rachel... you are a talented lady !

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  18. TerryDecember 14, 2011 at 2:33 PM

    Oh, this is fantastic. I can really feel your stress edged with humor. Great one for the challenge.

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  19. LorelyDecember 14, 2011 at 7:34 PM

    Oh well done! This is hilarious, and the pictures are wonderful! You deserve the Baileys! LOL

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  20. AnonymousDecember 14, 2011 at 11:56 PM

    GSussex
    An honest response that conveys so much. It works so well!

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  21. Susan MannDecember 15, 2011 at 12:29 AM

    What a fantastic piece, perfect writing as always and a great insight into the history. Love it. x

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  22. AnonymousDecember 15, 2011 at 12:55 AM

    Fantastic! Great line about the bottle of baileys easing the plight! So very true. It fits very well with the hymn too :O) x @Chaoskay (Sorry, I'm not anonymous, it just wouldn't recognise my OpenID for some reason)

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  23. ventahlDecember 15, 2011 at 1:20 AM

    In fact, I would go as far to say, this is the best piece I've read, but then, it does have that wry, dry wit I love. More! :D

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  24. HoniebukDecember 15, 2011 at 2:21 AM

    Sounds about right mi dear - and the Bailey's is such a modern touch (but will be here to stay)

    Loved the pictures

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  25. Rachel SelbyDecember 16, 2011 at 6:34 PM

    Thanks everyone - I couldn't have done it without the Baileys :)

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  26. GoofyJDecember 16, 2011 at 9:38 PM

    ha ha! Good one - and I love the photos you have to go with it. :-D

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  27. Rachel SelbyDecember 16, 2011 at 9:47 PM

    Thanks GoofyJ, just in cas anyone was in any doubt how it feels I had to add the pictures. And it gave it that old fashioned element which I like.

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  28. AnonymousDecember 18, 2011 at 5:54 AM

    brilliant - love the photos alongside the lyrics!

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  29. Him Up NorthDecember 18, 2011 at 9:11 PM

    Haha! Brilliant. The Brussels sprout comment made me laugh out loud.

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  30. Rachel SelbyDecember 19, 2011 at 12:53 AM

    North - Thanks, though I actually like them it seems to be fashionable to bash the sprout.

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  31. Sally-JayneDecember 19, 2011 at 11:39 AM

    Brilliant! This realy made me laugh!

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  32. Rachel SelbyDecember 19, 2011 at 1:16 PM

    Thanks S-J, love it that comments are still coming in on Monday!

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