Last week, after another long hot summer, the Jewish Festivals, and the recent security situation in Israel I hit rock bottom (again) vis-a-vis comfort eating, weight gaining, and not feeling good about my health in general.
As if by magic, I received two great sources of motivation to get out of this rut. The first was a photo of a friend whom I hadn't seen for about two years. Like me, she'd been overweight but she now looks spectacular. She hadn't just lost some weight, she looked slim in a way that I wasn't sure was possible this side of 50. We chatted online and I've been referring to her photo all week. Thank you dear friend, you know who you are. xxxx
The second source of motivation was being invited to join a group to promote healthy life habits. It's a wonderful idea. You choose a healthy habit to adopt for two weeks, whether it be diet, exercise, meditation, or whatever, and you report in every day for support and encouragement.
I chose the habit of eating three small meals a day with no snacks in between. For the first four days I reported in with a positive: I did it! And I briefly said what I'd eaten for each of my three meals. I also left positive and encouraging comments for other group members. We quickly created a nice atmosphere of warm mutual respect among the group members and it was working for me.
When I went shopping this week I stocked up on fruits and vegetables for making smoothies with spinach and nuts and ground flaxseed. I bought wholewheat bread rolls, tomato juice, nuts... I didn't buy eggs as I'm still striving to be vegan (well pisce-vegan with fish but no mammals or fowl). No sugar things like cakes, biscuits or ice-cream... I was psyched.
On day five I was expelled from the group.
The group leader sent me a pm asking me not to post what I was eating daily as it looked like she was endorsing my food choices and, as a professional in the field, she couldn't do that. Fair enough, although the group was free it was carrying the name of her private practice. No problem, I was only posting the food as a convenient alternative to writing it down in a notebook. I agreed to stop.
However, she also said that my diet was unsustainable and unhealthy (she actually just said I'm eating too little and not enough protein but implied that there was an etc). Obviously I disagreed with her. For a start she couldn't see my portion sizes which are more than adequate.
It's true that if you write 'avocado salad' and roast potatoes with ketchup for dinner, it doesn't look like a very balanced meal. But if the avocado salad is a large plate of avocado with loads of other vegetables, including pulses and nuts.... Ditto the spaghetti with vegetable soup as a sauce where the soup is a thick vegetable soup made with loads of vegetables and lentils served with pasta. One night I only ate the crusts of DD's pizza which she won't eat - so I don't have a super healthy meal every time but we're talking once in four days here. Maybe she didn't like that I'm not a breakfast person and when I'm on the run it tends to be just a cup of coffee. And I suppose I should have written apple/carrot smoothie instead of apple/carrot juice.
So I replied by pm that I found her assessment unfair but that I won't continue with the food diary. Tbh I don't know why she felt the need to belittle my diet in that way. Even if she did have healthier suggestions, there are ways of saying so without just dissing everything I've been doing. And I am on no way a fad dieter or a starver - I'm far too level headed for that and I need my energy to get through the day.
On my thread in the group I said that I understand about not listing my food choices and that's fine. However, I disagree with your assessment that my diet is unsustainable and I'll prove you wrong. I thought coaches love it when you rise to the challenge and achieve your goals despite negative feedback, or even because of it.
Apparently not. I got a pm saying, in light of what you wrote on the group this isn't going to work, I wish you all the best. And I was expelled from the group.
So what did I learn from this?
1. At only day five of my new healthy habit, being expelled from the healty habit group did not send me diving into the fridge looking for comfort. This was a revelation to me. (Ironically the group leader asked me only yesterday if I'd had any realizations yet and I hadn't as of then.) So five days in, the habit is already takng effect as a habit.
2. If someone tells me that I'm not capable of making sensible decisions about my health and diet, that only challenges me to prove that I am. As long as my actions are positive, healthy, helpful, and that they don't harm anyone (including myself). Not to gloat but for my own satisfaction that I'm capable of making sensible choices and following it through.
3. I've no time for other people's sensitive or controlling egoes (even on their own turf). Nor for people who don't give the benefit of the doubt and start from the belief that I'm a good team player who isn't out to make trouble. People who aren't up for any discussion. Don't we all know that most disagreement in writing is not getting the nuances or full picture from a few words?
4. If someone doesn't want you in their gang you can start your own gang. I almost started a new fb group called, 'Make it a Habit'. My group is about any good habit - reading, studying, learning a language, writing, decluttering, cleaning your house, as well as healthy habits. Whatever you want and however you want to do it. As long as it's not harmful or hurtful to anyone, I won't judge. But then I thought - who needs another fb group anyway? I am going to continue with it on this blog though, adding a new habit every three weeks instead of two weeks (I read that it takes three weeks to really establish a habit).
5. Some ridiculous events in life are nevertheless good blog fodder.
Anyway, at the end of the first week I have lost 5.2lbs. I'm still sticking to my new habit of three meals a day with no snacks in between. And I'm still motivated thanks to my friend with the photo.
As if by magic, I received two great sources of motivation to get out of this rut. The first was a photo of a friend whom I hadn't seen for about two years. Like me, she'd been overweight but she now looks spectacular. She hadn't just lost some weight, she looked slim in a way that I wasn't sure was possible this side of 50. We chatted online and I've been referring to her photo all week. Thank you dear friend, you know who you are. xxxx
The second source of motivation was being invited to join a group to promote healthy life habits. It's a wonderful idea. You choose a healthy habit to adopt for two weeks, whether it be diet, exercise, meditation, or whatever, and you report in every day for support and encouragement.
I chose the habit of eating three small meals a day with no snacks in between. For the first four days I reported in with a positive: I did it! And I briefly said what I'd eaten for each of my three meals. I also left positive and encouraging comments for other group members. We quickly created a nice atmosphere of warm mutual respect among the group members and it was working for me.
When I went shopping this week I stocked up on fruits and vegetables for making smoothies with spinach and nuts and ground flaxseed. I bought wholewheat bread rolls, tomato juice, nuts... I didn't buy eggs as I'm still striving to be vegan (well pisce-vegan with fish but no mammals or fowl). No sugar things like cakes, biscuits or ice-cream... I was psyched.
On day five I was expelled from the group.
The group leader sent me a pm asking me not to post what I was eating daily as it looked like she was endorsing my food choices and, as a professional in the field, she couldn't do that. Fair enough, although the group was free it was carrying the name of her private practice. No problem, I was only posting the food as a convenient alternative to writing it down in a notebook. I agreed to stop.
However, she also said that my diet was unsustainable and unhealthy (she actually just said I'm eating too little and not enough protein but implied that there was an etc). Obviously I disagreed with her. For a start she couldn't see my portion sizes which are more than adequate.
It's true that if you write 'avocado salad' and roast potatoes with ketchup for dinner, it doesn't look like a very balanced meal. But if the avocado salad is a large plate of avocado with loads of other vegetables, including pulses and nuts.... Ditto the spaghetti with vegetable soup as a sauce where the soup is a thick vegetable soup made with loads of vegetables and lentils served with pasta. One night I only ate the crusts of DD's pizza which she won't eat - so I don't have a super healthy meal every time but we're talking once in four days here. Maybe she didn't like that I'm not a breakfast person and when I'm on the run it tends to be just a cup of coffee. And I suppose I should have written apple/carrot smoothie instead of apple/carrot juice.
So I replied by pm that I found her assessment unfair but that I won't continue with the food diary. Tbh I don't know why she felt the need to belittle my diet in that way. Even if she did have healthier suggestions, there are ways of saying so without just dissing everything I've been doing. And I am on no way a fad dieter or a starver - I'm far too level headed for that and I need my energy to get through the day.
On my thread in the group I said that I understand about not listing my food choices and that's fine. However, I disagree with your assessment that my diet is unsustainable and I'll prove you wrong. I thought coaches love it when you rise to the challenge and achieve your goals despite negative feedback, or even because of it.
Apparently not. I got a pm saying, in light of what you wrote on the group this isn't going to work, I wish you all the best. And I was expelled from the group.
So what did I learn from this?
1. At only day five of my new healthy habit, being expelled from the healty habit group did not send me diving into the fridge looking for comfort. This was a revelation to me. (Ironically the group leader asked me only yesterday if I'd had any realizations yet and I hadn't as of then.) So five days in, the habit is already takng effect as a habit.
2. If someone tells me that I'm not capable of making sensible decisions about my health and diet, that only challenges me to prove that I am. As long as my actions are positive, healthy, helpful, and that they don't harm anyone (including myself). Not to gloat but for my own satisfaction that I'm capable of making sensible choices and following it through.
3. I've no time for other people's sensitive or controlling egoes (even on their own turf). Nor for people who don't give the benefit of the doubt and start from the belief that I'm a good team player who isn't out to make trouble. People who aren't up for any discussion. Don't we all know that most disagreement in writing is not getting the nuances or full picture from a few words?
4. If someone doesn't want you in their gang you can start your own gang. I almost started a new fb group called, 'Make it a Habit'. My group is about any good habit - reading, studying, learning a language, writing, decluttering, cleaning your house, as well as healthy habits. Whatever you want and however you want to do it. As long as it's not harmful or hurtful to anyone, I won't judge. But then I thought - who needs another fb group anyway? I am going to continue with it on this blog though, adding a new habit every three weeks instead of two weeks (I read that it takes three weeks to really establish a habit).
5. Some ridiculous events in life are nevertheless good blog fodder.
Anyway, at the end of the first week I have lost 5.2lbs. I'm still sticking to my new habit of three meals a day with no snacks in between. And I'm still motivated thanks to my friend with the photo.